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  1. Paul Falcone
    Paul Falcone December 22, 2016 at 6:50 pm | | Reply

    I was borne in 1950 with an obscure blood disease called Neutropenia, a white blood cell deficiency, which was considered rare and fatal. Within twenty minutes of being borne the germs were at me and I was sick. I went to Dartmouth where they diagnosed the problem that was considered 60% fatal at that time. I went from one infection to another and each birthday was a wonder that I had survived another year. I almost died four times but for some reason came back for another birthday. By ten I was more than tired of the whole thing, the cycle of slowly getting better and then a plateau of wellness while all the time afraid and thinking that the germs knew my name, so I changed it, announced I wanted my middle name Paul, that Freddy was dead. Always it felt that the thread between life and death was very thin and tenuous, ready to go at any time. I remember floating in a coma feeling very relaxed and unworried, surrounded by other beings, then waking up in my own body feeling very dispirited, angry even, to have lived because I knew I would just get sick again and wanted it over. But what I can say with certainty, is that where you go after death is a very comfortable, peaceful place, without pain, cold or ego, among many others, who have gone before, which I look forward to at the end.

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